自信

早上听袁腾飞说崇祯,挺有点意思。虽然崇祯没受过良好教育,但不影响他想当一个好皇帝的宏伟志向。只是没什么能力的他,格外地不自信,一不自信就要求别人必须听他的,特别在意这个,然后就把国家整了个天翻地覆,灭了家国。

其实,自信挺难的。记得念大学时和小学时代班里的女神通信,她告诉我她那时候自卑极了,我都惊呆了。那是一个传说中德智体美劳全面发展的姑娘,人又漂漂亮亮的,家境也好,老师极器重。可她实实在在的自卑着。我小时候,也挺自卑的,家境差,衣衫褴褛中老师难免看轻,还好有成绩好牵引着,日子不至于太难过。其实,直到念完大学,也没觉得有多自信,最多就是不那么自卑而已。

大概是中国的教育坑人吧,不管是老师还是家长,总把人划个三六九等,总不爱表示爱,还总爱拿我们和别人家孩子比较。家境好的成绩不是最优,成绩最优的又长得不太讨喜,长得讨喜的吧嘴又笨了点。于是,我们人人都自卑了。我们不知道其实我们都是独一无二的,都是值得人珍爱的。

有时候,看身边的同事可笑至极的举动,会理解并同情他。没有自信的人,势必要拿各种去粉饰,要用各种去装扮,殊不知在别人眼中都是笑话。比如,极爱自己权威的某领导,必须事事时时都遵他的令,实在是没有自信的表现。若是信心满满,自然能就事论事,虚心听别人的意见,真心寻自己的不足。

只是,虽然我们大多在同样的自卑中成长,但有的人在岁月里在优秀中会慢慢长出自信,有的人在堕落里在沉沦中越陷越深。怎样自信这是个太复杂的命题,儿童时代的教育一定占了极大的比重,但我相信后天的成长磨练也是不可或缺的因素。总归,优秀有助于自信。优秀-自信-优秀,这是一个良性循环。失败-自卑-失败,则是另一种循环。

絮絮叨叨,不写了。感觉这应该分为好几篇来论,夹在一起显得含糊不清,就这样吧。

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